Finance Type Talk
If you are...
And Your Partner is ...

Extravert
Introvert

Extravert
* Decide what's private and what's public information, so you don't accidentally disclose sensitive matters.
* Demand that your needs and positions be heard on financial matters.


* Try not to compete by bragging about your finances to friends and to each other.
* Make it clear to your partner about which matters are public and which are private.


* Work hard at listening to each other's opposing points of view.
* Demand time for reflection-at least 24 hours-after discussing any financial discussions before taking action. 


Extravert
Introvert

Introvert
* Respect that your partner's finances may be very private to him or her.
* Commit to regularly sharing your thoughts and feelings on financial issues.


* Check in advance what can and cannot be shared.
* Remember that it is okay to seek help from financial professionals.


* Beware of exaggerating, overpowering, fast-talking, or not listening to your partner.
* Work at keeping the communication lines open. Take nothing for granted.  


Sensor
Intuitive

Sensor
* Though exactness is important, remember there is more to finance than facts and figures.
* Pay attention to the specifics and details, knowing you can trip yourself up if you don't.  


* Try not to bury one another in details.
* Draw on your partner's natural talents to deal with being practical and factual about finances.


* Stay aware of precision and the present, but allow wiggle room for future fun.
* Help your partner see possibilities and future potential without demeaning his or her point of view.


Sensor
Intuitive

iNtuitive
* Work at balancing your need for exactness with some unknown possibilities.
* Given that neither of you is good with details, make sure someone is covering them.


* Keep your partner aware of specific amounts, as well as your specific needs.
* Seek out someone who will implement your combined master financial plans.


* Provide details to flesh out your partner's fantasies and big-picture ideas.
* Take some time to identify each of your roles and responsibilities in financial matters.


Finance Type Talk
If you are...
And Your Partner is ...

Thinker
Feeler

Thinker
* Money can represent power to you both.  Be careful not to let it become stifling or a source of abuse.
* Be careful not to lay guilt on your partner over financial disagreements.


* Remind each other there's more to life and your relationship than dollars and cents.
* Respect your partner's objectivity. Don't be afraid to use it to absolve your personal guilt. 


* Recognize each other's financial strengths and use them accordingly.
* Avoid personalizing your differences. Hang tough during financial discussions and disagreements. 


Thinker
Feeler

Feeler
* Be aware that your sharp differences may not mean that one of you is "right" and the other "wrong."
* Resolve early on who is to be chiefly responsible and have the final word on financial matters. 


* Clarify your roles and be mindful of how each of you gives perspective to each other. 
* Keep in mind that an outside financial consultant may be helpful in providing objectivity. 


* Help your partner recognize the limits of your finances, and sort out the causes without imposing blame or guilt. 
* Avoidance and denial won't help. Success requires leadership with a minimum of personalization.


Judger
Perceiver

Judger
* Be careful to avoid too much focus on money, work, and savings.
* Remember that your partner will become stressed by a lack of structure, particularly with money matters.


* Schedule some unaccountable "fun money" for each of you.
* Show your partner how windfalls and unplanned income can be opportunities for fun.


* Remind yourselves that money is not the goal, it is only a resource for achieving your goals.
* Help your partner see the need for both focusing and being spontaneous regarding finances.


Judger
Perceiver

Perceiver
* Negotiate early on about your roles, responsibilities, and how you'll stay accountable to each other. 
* Determine early on who will have major and who will have minor financial responsibilities.


* Try not to "one-up" your partner on financial matters.
* Try to stay focused on your financial goals, knowing that you'll still manage to find ways to make it fun. 


* Keep your goals in focus, but allow money for unplanned matters.
* Support each other. Finances are not a strength for either of you.  Don't hesitate to use outside help.

(c) Otto Kroeger Associates, 2000		Page 2

